“OK, Let's Go Online”

"OK, let's go online."

On the screen, the face of Director Zhang was fragmented into countless small squares by pixels, like a digital-era Mona Lisa. Despite the slight distortion of the image, his perpetually unsmiling eyes still accurately captured the subtle expressions on each employee's face.

Li Ming adjusted his posture, trying to make his background look less cluttered. He glanced around, and other colleagues' computer screens were also flickering. Each person's expression was as if they were completing a difficult task: pretending to be listening intently.

"Today's meeting topic is to improve employee well-being," Director Zhang's voice crackled with a slight electronic hum. "After discussions among the management, we have decided that starting next month, we will add half an hour of ‘online loafing’ time every Friday afternoon. During this time, employees can freely choose their favorite activities, such as listening to music, watching movies, or doing nothing at all."

Li Ming's mouth twitched slightly upon hearing this. Online loafing? Isn't that what they do every day at work? Only now, it's been given such a high-sounding justification, as if the company were awarding them medals for their laziness.

"Does anyone have any questions?" Director Zhang asked as a formality, of course, not expecting any actual questions.

Sure enough, there was silence. Everyone's microphones were muted, and only the sound of mouse clicks could be heard from time to time.

"Very good, everyone understands our good intentions," Director Zhang nodded with satisfaction. "Now, let's listen to the work plan for next quarter."

The meeting continued, and for the rest of the time, Li Ming felt like a plastic toy that had been thrown into a washing machine, repeatedly scrubbed by various data, reports, and slogans of "innovation" until his consciousness blurred.

Finally, the meeting was nearing its end. Director Zhang cleared his throat and announced an important decision: "To encourage everyone to actively participate in online activities, we will hold an ‘Online Loafing’ competition next month, to select the employee with the most ‘loafing’ spirit, and give them a certain reward."

Hearing this, Li Ming couldn't help but ask, cautiously, with his microphone on: "Director Zhang, what... what is the reward?"

On the screen, Director Zhang's face magnified slightly, and the corners of his mouth seemed to curve upwards a bit, but quickly returned to their usual composure. "The reward? Of course, it’s… priority participation rights for the next ‘Online Loafing’ competition!"

Li Ming was stunned. He felt a deep sense of powerlessness surge through him, like the feeling he had to face every morning, the endless online meetings.

He quietly turned off his microphone, watched Director Zhang still talking on the screen, and the corners of his mouth slowly curved into an ironic arc. Suddenly, his phone buzzed. It was a message from Xiao Wang in the department: "Li Ge, quick, the registration link for the loafing competition is out, did you sign up?"

Li Ming slowly typed a single word: "Signed."

Then, he clicked on the registration page for the loafing competition, and a small line of text on the page read: Registration constitutes agreement with the "Online Loafing Activity Participation Agreement", and a voluntary assumption of all consequences.

Li Ming clicked agree, and the page jumped to the next prompt: Congratulations, your registration is successful, and you have received the exclusive title for this loafing competition - "Best Water Skimmer."

Li Ming looked at the screen and suddenly laughed, the laughter growing louder and louder until it turned into silent sobs. He shut down the computer, got up, and walked to the window. The sun was shining brightly outside, and he saw the cactus on his desk, which had, at some point, bloomed a tiny, absurd flower.